Woke up this morning and went into the lounge to find my Dad sat on the sofa wearing his 3D cinema glasses in all seriousness. He said he was trying out a ‘new look’ for when he needs real glasses. He reckons he should spike his hair up, don a pair of black rimmed glasses and only answer to Je-Dad…’Like a Jedi?’ I asked puzzled…’Yes’ he beamed back. Simple things and all that eh?

Was really happy today to find that my new articles have been published in a lifestyle magazine and, of course, credited to me. (Maybe the terrible broadsheet should take note?) The broadsheet called me a ‘Wannabe’ and basically said I woudn’t get work anywhere. Maybe I should send them a lovely little package containing my work, topped with a big green bow? Anyway, Karma comes back around so I shouldn’t worry too much.

I’m heading towards the farm tonight to see my favourite pooches; Shelley, Sally, Henry and Molly. There’s now a new edition to the farm family with the cutie little kitty, Tilly. She’s in the stage of being friskily funny and being obsessed with a rattling mouse toy. I wish I could be entertained by something so simple for so long!

Had a nice long shopping trip yesterday and visited the cinema to see Avatar and work out what the fuss is all about. I did enjoy it but I was that shattered that I was flagging half way through it and woke myself up with an abrupt sleep twitch. Not cool when it’s combined with a little cry of shock wondering what’s going on…

Had to buy party feet as my boots were killing me. I didn’t want to sit on a bench and put them in my boots for the sheer amount of people who stare, so thought I’d stand in the shop and do it out of sight. It would have worked if I’d not managed to catch a full display of chocolates in boxes and send them crashing to the floor one after the other. My parents ran away giggling leaving me with one boot on shovelling the chocs back onto the shelf…I’m just so smooth you see…

Dad bought me a gorgeous Jasper Conran case to take to London with me next week…amazing how a new case can make your whole trip SO much more exciting! Also got a couple of Macs, Tops and Shoes. Hopefully I’ll regain some street cred with my new accessories because God knows I can’t go anywhere without doing something clumsy!

Plagiarism…defined as “the use or close imitation of the language and thoughts of another author and the representation of them as one’s own original work” according to Library Plagiarism Policies. Notice the quote marks? This is because I am ‘quoting’ therefore not plagiarising anybodys work.

Their definition differs from mine….mine stands as “untalented individual who is both a fraud and masquerading under a false exterior. Often brainless and unwitty and not understanding of simple words like cheat, liar and complete and utter idiot.”

The reason why I am so annoyed is that my work has been copied word for word, added to and printed in a broadsheet and passed off as somebody elses. Infuriating.

On a better note, got a laugh at L this morning as he had a dream consisting of ‘lots of ice’. He said he was building an igloo small enough to carry in order to give to Katie Price. I wonder what goes through his head at times…

Decided to visit the farm shop and cafe this morning to get into the whole country vibe and have a change of scene. I was most impressed to discover the choices of Special Reserve Port on offer..don’t mind if I do…As a food lover I can spend quite a while mulling over jars of goodies and fresh and wild produce.

Visited the on site cafe and was amused to find a huge silver bucket on the table full of kitchen roll and a smaller bucket for rubbish. Breakfast arrived and everything was going great until the waitress forgot my latte…good lord, disaster! Had to spend a fair amount of time arguing that I did order said latte and had proof of a receipt to the waitresses shocked expression. Less than two minutes later, a gorgeous latte was whisked over to my table with a beautiful chocolate truffle tokened on the side. How delightful! Just goes to show that honest persistance goes a long way!

Oh and note to self: Never EVER visit the butchers whilst adorned in Swarovski, high heels and a little black dress…unless your ulterior motive is to find a butcher and not his produce that is…

Can somebody please tell me what the white lipstick look is all about? Without sounding like whining old woman talking about the ‘good old days’, I find it extremely hard to understand why even the prettiest of girls succumbs to the almighty blinding bright white lipstick nowadays?

What I find even harder to understand is the deep orange ‘I’ve broken out of the leather factory’ tan that goes with it. Oh and the electrocuted back-combed hair look. Girls, what are you inflicting on yourselves?

I beg of all of you, step away from the unflattering products and let your natural beauty shine through. White is not right…